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Spring Forward

Spring Forward

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I pointed to the hot blond guy I’d been eyeing in the club for half an hour and said to my friend Felicia, “I’ll bet you 20 bucks I can have that dude’s cock in my mouth in five minutes.”

She was scandalized by my comment. “Jeez, Fay, I know you’re not happy about breaking up with Tony, but — ”

Felicia was right, I sure as fuck wasn’t happy. I’d caught my boyfriend getting a blowjob at a party in a hall closet, of all places. I was mortified. He tried “explaining,” saying the woman had just come up to him and offered. He couldn’t say no. That was his excuse. What an asshole.

It had happened in a house off-campus just before spring break. Now I was at the beach with my friends, pissed off, drinking too much and eager to do something stupid.

I slapped a 20 angrily on the table, almost upsetting our tropical drinks.

“I’m saying that shithead Tony was right!” I said. “No guy’ll turn down a blowjob. Five minutes!”

With that I spun away, feeling the drinks, I’d had. I marched over to the blond guy, who was standing alone. I’d never tried anything quite like this before. Under other circumstances I was actually sort of shy.

“Hi,” I said. Not the boldest opening, I admit.

“Hi.” He smiled.

“Do you… ” I trailed off.

“Do I… ?” he prompted me.

I brought up a mental picture of Tony, which reignited my anger. I stiffened my backbone, and said, “Do you want a blowjob?”

Once the words were out, I felt as embarrassed as I’d been at that party with Tony. But I stuck to my guns and didn’t flinch.

The hot blond’s smile had frozen. Finally, he said, “That’s some kind of trick question, right?”

“I mean it. Let’s step out onto the beach. Hell, I’ll do you in this corner. I — ”

“No,” he said.

“What?!” Whatever else I might’ve been expecting, a flat “no” wasn’t it. “What the hell do you mean?”

“Just that. No. You’re a very attractive woman. In fact, I’ve been wanting to go over and talk to you. But now I see you’re a little drunk.”

“But I bet 20 bucks!” I heard myself yelp.

He slipped a 20 out of his pocket and pressed it into my hand. He wasn’t acting like a jerk. Really, he was being an unbelievable gentleman about the whole thing. “No bad feelings about this, okay?” With that he stepped past me.

I looked back at the table. Felicia had split, too, probably unable to watch me make a fool out of myself.

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